Why He Will Not Commit

As we get into or 30s (and sometime even in our 20s) the urgency to find a partner, whom we can marry and start a family with, can become overwhelming. We've has found this dilemma among both men and women, but more so with women. Perhaps it’s the “biological” clock or society’s conditioning, but regardless of the reason the person who finds himself or herself on the short end of the relationship stick are usually left asking, “What’s wrong with me?”. In a candid discussion, the men folk opened up about dating, sex, love, and the reasons why they have felt a lack of desire to commit to a woman. Read on, as you may be surprised to learn the real reasons why your guy isn’t ready to be … your guy!

Among the men that we've spoken with, the reoccurring complaint was over women who are “needy”. Personally, I find neediness to be a really unattractive trait in a man. Emotional neediness is exhausting. Having to constantly reassure another person that you like them or care about them is what I refer to as emotional suckage, meaning that the other person is sucking the life and energy from your being. Doesn’t sound like fun does it? So, if you need constant reassurance/validation from another person, you need not even consider a relationship … except perhaps working on the one (and most important) with yourself.

With that said, let’s look at a few of the reasons why your guy isn’t really your guy:

He’s a Romance Junkie – Love Is Like A Drug spoke to a friend from NYC and he admitted that he was completely addicted to “love”. All that goes on in the first few months of dating, from the coy flirting to anticipatory butterflies, was what he enjoyed. And he flat out stated that once the newness wore off, he got bored. (Read, “The 90-Day Rule,”).

He’s not over the ex – Now, this isn’t necessarily an issue of him still being in love with his ex. Of course when people break up, the next person who comes along is usually “rebound” and that’s just how it is. But, him not being over his ex may have more to do with how that relationship ended.

He’s content with his world – Not every guy, or woman, needs a partner to feel complete and fulfilled in life. Some guys are focused on other things like their careers and although they enjoy companionship (plus other benefits), they’re not looking for a wife.

Hopefully, you’ll see that not one of these reasons equates to anything lacking in you. The bottom line is that it’s not you … or him. You’re simply not the one for him and who cares? There are 7 billion people on the planet so go find someone who works in your world! Oh, and don’t forget to have fun while you’re searching.